“God, it’s killing me”. -- Roger Federer after the 2009 Australian Open Finals loss to Nadal.
You know you've lost all your writing knack when you have to resort to the same opening lines used in another blog post. But, what do you do when these are the thoughts you wake up with, on the bluest possible Monday morning?
WhatsApp and Social Media have been inundated by posts on how we should be proud of the Indian Cricket Team, and not abuse them/their family on social media. The general outpouring of love and support at them has, in fact, been heartening. I AM proud of the Men in Blue, will always be. I AM proud of the "brand of cricket" they have conjured in the past seven weeks. Abusing anyone on social media was never a consideration. But none of those messages have told me how to cope with this setback heartbreak soul-crushing at a personal level.
Raghav had commented before the start of the match of how the next few hours were going to define our mental state for the next 10 years. I'll be bluffing if I say that cricket is just a game for me, and for many I know. The World Cup was not so much about the players, it was more about us. (Hadn't we ditched a seemingly indispensable Pandya because his absence seemed to bring desired results in a few matches, before it came to haunt us in the finals?).
Federer would have been proud of the "brand of tennis" he would have been playing leading upto that loss (and some gut wrenching losses preceding that). Yet, he was upset dejected destroyed by the outcome of that match. The runner-up feat was no consolation to him. The likes of Kohli, Sharma, Bumrah, Shami were all destroyed by the loss as was evident from the visuals available - more than what the visuals portrayed, more than we can ever fathom, more than we can ever empathise. None of them were probably thinking about the potential abuses that could come their way. Yet, it was killing them.
In the brilliant season finale of Loki Season 2 (titled 'Glorious Purpose'), Mobius comments to Loki that 'most purpose is more burden than glory'. The Indian cricketers were within striking distance of glory; yet, will have to carry a lifetime of burden. The burden will be shared by the fans. The glory for us will perhaps come in another season. Some cricketers will never have another shot at it.
Over the last few hours that I have been awake, I have been dissecting the final match. It has been almost theatrical in the sense that a version of me dressed in white robes has been in zen mode, saying that the boys gave it their best and one bad day should not define them. They have not just won, but annihilated oppositions in the road to the finals. Ohh the joy they have brought in our lives for all these weeks! Another version of me dressed in black robes, perhaps as a cold and calculating judge concerned not with purpose but results, has been questioning the reading of the pitch, and the mid-inning tactics. What prompted the management to go for the pitch they did, a move which backfired grandly? How does one explain only 4 boundaries in the last 40 overs? In Tennis, it is always about one bad game. India have lost only 4 games (out of 28) in the last 3 World Cups, yet have come out as losing finalists or semi-finalsts. (Both these versions were encapsulated by Abhishek and Madhukar in our WhatsApp group).
There are comparisons with 2003, and many have commented that it was worse two decades ago. In season 2, Loki masters "time slipping" and is able to re-orchestrate the same event again and again hoping for a better result. What makes 2023 worse for me is the knowledge that, unlike 2003, we were the better team of the two now. If the same match were re-orchestrated again and again, India would emerge triumphs more often than not.
The cricketers, support staff, management will have to take the hard grind, and don the purpose of burden for more time. No amount of dissection has given me any answer, or brought me any closer to it. Loki had seemingly found his glorious purpose - that of being able to oversee his friends happy. But time slipping is not an option, the Indian Cricket Team fans will have to continue to wait for the future.
It will be a long and agonizing wait, but as a perennially optimistic fan, am hoping it will be met with glory some day.
